Were You There?

One of my favorite hymns this time of year is the African American Spiritual Were you there.

Do you know it?

Were you there when they crucified my Lord

Were you there when they crucified my Lord
Ooh sometimes it causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble, tremble, tremble. 

Were you there when they crucified my lord.

This week especially after Good Friday -- it usually gets stuck in my head in vicious loop and I hum it and sing it -- kids start hollering at me.  And it doesn’t end well. 

But for me it is a powerful hymn—it transports me it’s like a time machine that takes me  to that day two thousand years ago and I can stand there on the hill and watch- and I stand there in the crowd and I watch---and  I begin to feel the gravity, the emotions the weight  of that fateful day.

This week I realized that while this hymn takes me to Golgotha—to the crucifixion-I go there simply as a observer of the events—I never really enter into the story I  simply watch it unfold.   This week as I contemplated that I began to wonder and imagine myself in different people’s places and wondered how would I have  responded--- who would I have been if I was there.

Of course, I want to imagine that I was one of the women who followed who stayed strong through it all—I wanted to imagine I might have been the one lone-nameless disciple who stuck around and who then took mother Mary into his home and cared for her.   

But when I contemplate the events of Good Friday—I don’t know that I would have been that strong. I imagine that I might have been more like Peter that day

Are you a disciple? I am not

Are you follower I am not

Do you know this man?  I do not.

I would imagine that I might have tucked tail and ran too—for I know there are times when I am not comfortable in my own skin being a follower of Jesus—declaring my allegiance. I know that when I am truly honest—I too have denied Christ by my words and deeds.

If I am honest with myself—I might have been there in the crowd that day when Jesus is paraded out and I might have been in the  crowd raising my fist --Crucify Him-Crucify Him.  I could see myself with those words on my lips-for how many times have I just gone along with the crowd even when I knew it was wrong---how many times have I not stood up for the right thing and just got sucked in with the crowd.

If I am honest, I might even have been a little bit like Pilate——who bends to the crowd- who maybe is a little worried about what people might think-who  maybe is a bit of a people pleaser.  I can see myself as Pilate  there too choosing pleasing people over choosing ways of goodness.  

When we are honest with ourselves—we have all been there—we have all had moments of denial and betrayal.  to faith and to each other. 

I guess in some way we are responsible for Jesus death—we do it every single day,  when we continue to choose darkness over light—we continue to participate in  unjust systems.  We do it when we don’t stand up to the power and we do it when we fail to stand with the down-trodden or the bullied.  We do it when we go along with the crowd.  

Today we find that the story isn’t just about Jesus but it’s also about us.  

Today we were there when they crucified the Lord- we were there wielding the hammer we were there jeering – and it doesn’t look pretty because this is a story about us. 

Amen