Spiritual blindness comes in many forms. Sometimes it’s about being blind to human suffering and need around us. Just the other day I was driving here to St. Dunstan’s, I came across someone who had run out of gas— it was quite obvious –he had gas can in hand and was walking down the street away from his car---did I stop and offer him a lift-- no- I would have been late for an appointment if I had stop. I was indifferent to his plight at that particular moment
Sometimes spiritual blindness afflicts us and we can’t see the work of God in and around us. I think that is what afflicted the Pharisees in the story today. They couldn’t believe that this man had been born blind and healed and that God might actually be at work on the Sabbath.
I’d like to tell you about a time when I was unable to see the hand of God at work in my own life. It was way back 17 years ago. I had begun to discern whether or not I might be called to be a priest. Folks I have to say, I just didn’t see that I could do the job of being a priest—I had this image of this cookie cutter image of a priest--- what a priest looked like— I saw a priest squeaky clean, a shining example--- I saw priest who were incredibly smart, intellectual ---and of course Priest had to be extroverted—someone "ok" being out front on Sunday morning.
I just didn’t see me fitting into that cookie cutter. I don’t see myself as particularly smart or squeaky clean and at the time I was a lector and I would get incredibly nervous when I had to read on Sunday morning--- I am certainly not an extrovert.
I probably had you fooled there didn’t I. I can fake it real good on Sunday morning—getting out here in front of you—putting all my energy into this. I can look an awful lot like an extrovert, But really I am a dyed in the wool introvert.
What that means is I expend a lot of energy on Sunday morning and Sunday afternoon I go home curl up into the fetal position and suck my thumb. I really need a nap after Sunday morning because this is exhausting. You may not know this but most Episcopal Clergy are introverts and on Sunday afternoon the most popular post on Facebook among my clergy friends is about the Sunday afternoon nap.
17 years ago, I just couldn’t see it—I just couldn’t see how I Sean Thomas Leonard could possibly be a priest.—That was until one day when I went on retreat. I arrived at the Jesuit Retreat Center in Wernersville, Pennsylvania and after I checked in, had dinner I sat down with my spiritual director and he gave me a poem to read—you know that poem that I read to you last week “Known” by Charles Robinson -that was the poem he gave to me.
He said read this and imagine that God might be saying these words to you. So The next day after breakfast I sat down outside in the sun to read the poem as I read the words of the poem. As I read the words the presence of God flooded into my life and imagined God saying things “I know you- I created it, I am creating you." I imagined God saying to me “we will do this together—the tears began to flow—and the scales of blindness fell from my eyes. It was as if Jesus had spat into the mud and washed my eyes and I could see myself differently.
And I knew in that moment, that if I was being called to the priesthood—I would be able to do this-not because I would be doing it alone, but that God and I, we would be doing it together. The words of the 23rd Psalm- became real—yeah though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil for you-are- with-me your rod and your staff they comfort me.
I now am able to take that sight everywhere with me—when I step into this pulpit I know that don’t go here alone—God’s Spirit comes with me—God’s spirit informs me and gives me confidence to preach these words. When I hold someone’s hand as they are dying or visit someone in the hospital
—I know God is with us in that holy moment. When I look at our budget difficulties— am I worried, not really because I also know that God is with us and is working this out with us--- doesn’t mean we don’t have hard work to do, but that day in Wernersville Pennsylvania showed me that there is something bigger at work in all this.
I once was blind but now I see.
The thing is that we can’t make ourselves have spiritual sight—that is Jesus work to spit in the mud and rub it in our eyes. We simply have to keep saying your prayers-keep opening your bibles—keep doing good—keep coming to church and putting yourself out there before God—Because I know Jesus healed the man born blind—I know that he has healed me and I know that he has more of that for me and for all of us. Sometimes that healing comes in great moments of conversion that happen all of a sudden, but more often than not it’s a slow, slow process.
Folks this morning the best I can offer is to say I once was blind, but now I see. And Jesus is the giver of that sight.
AMEN
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