Charity or Relationship

Lent V March 17, 2013

Several years ago, I met with a team in the diocese of Central Pennsylvania that was working to develop a companion relationship with a diocese in Brazil.   Our two dioceses had signed a partnership agreement and a team was set up find ways to strengthen that relationship.   I had been invited to the meeting because I had hosted a Brazilian priest for a few days while he visited the diocese. Now our diocese had earmarked for the companion relationship, but the team wasn't sure what to do with it. 

At the meeting I attended an intense debate broke out about how best to use the money.  On one side of the debate were the folks who wanted to send the money down to support a diocesan treatment facility-  that was treating young teenage boys who had become addicted to cocaine, on the other side of the debate were folks who thought the best use of the money would be to send a team down to see the facility- meet the boys –build relationships.   

Now -the stories we were hearing were just heartbreaking 12 and 13 year old boys who were drug addicted.  Most of the folks at the meeting thought it would be a waste of money to send team- the money could be used to treat boys- to save lives.  A few people though argued for the importance of relationship building- send a time.  Back and forth we went- no resolution. 

As that meeting got tense-- I decided to share something that I had heard the Bishop of Haiti say at  a  partnership conference years earlier.   

Bishop Duracin was speaking to Americans  who  were trying to establish their own partnerships --if you have $3000 dollars for Haiti send us $2000 and use $1000 to come be with us.  If you have $2000 earmarked for Haiti send us 1000 dollars and use 1000 to come be with us.  And if you have 1000 dollars for Haiti- Bishop Duracin said-- just come.  Just come and be with us.    When he said that I was absolutely floored— I thought couldn’t they use every penny of our money.   Bishop Duracin reminded us that there is something more important than offering charity, there is something important  more offering just a handout  there is something more important than buying groceries  - that’s building relationships-  that binding ourselves to one another by walking in each other’s shoes. 

Charity or relationship- isn't that the debate today, isn't that some of what’s in question in the Gospel.  Mary has taken a really expensive bottle of perfume—300 denarii (think $6000) and poured it  all over Jesus feet- she has gently taken Jesus feet into her hands – she’s washed the dust and the  road dirt off  with her hair.

This is a very intimate moment- she could have easily use pitcher of water and a towel, like a servant might- but instead- she uses this high priced perfume and she leans over and wipes His feet with her hair. She anoints and she binds herself to Christ.  I think what she is saying -- I will walk with you Lord Christ- through thick and thin- I will walk with you all the way to the tomb?  I will go where you go?

But the people in  the room  are upset- she’s wasted her money-- Judas in  John’s version of the story becomes the spokesperson, "Couldn't she have used that money to buy some groceries for the poor?"

Jesus doesn't say to Judas-  “you know what you are absolutely right-  how foolish of Mary didn't she see the child out by the gate- with the tin cup begging causing he hasn't had meal-  begging caused his belly is all cramped up.

Instead Jesus says “You leave her alone... you will always have the poor, you won’t always have me."

Charity or relationship-  in that moment Mary has chosen relationship- she’s chosen to love Jesus extravagantly- to bind herself to Christ--- to walk with him until the end.

What about us?  Charity or relationship—have you seen the foyer out there today- This weekend is the Park Parson’s food drive-- the groceries have been stacking up since about Friday- we always do a good job when it comes to the Park Parson food drive—One of my favorite images of the food drive came a few years ago.  After the 10 o’clock service was over I was back in my office taking off my   vestments when I glance -- out the window to see Misty Burney pulling away from the curb  in her black SUV to deliver all  the grocery bags—  but the funny thing was  I  couldn't tell if she was driving it or not because there were so many grocery bags stacked  up all around her you couldn't see her. 

What about us? Charity or relationship?

This parish has a long tradition of feeding the poor- caring for the less fortunate--  year after year  we host the Heifer fair-  our children get dressed up like  pigs, they cluck like chicken  as we walk through their  living gifts  market - they try to convince us   what good investment a water buffalo would be.   All the money is used to purchase animals for people and families in the  third world.

 

 One of the unconscious messages that I got growing up was that being  a Christian was  about being, nice and  good and doing good things—it was  about showing up at church on Sunday.  Making sure you went to confession- to tell how many time you lied or pinched your sister. Is our Christian walk about charity and being a good person or is it about relationship ?

What if being good- being nice, Christian charity is only the tip of the iceberg-- this passage calls disciples- calls  you and I to something deeper—Bishop Duracin called that conference to something  deeper- if you have a thousand dollars for Haiti- just come-  don’t spend it on charity--just come and be with us—Christianity  is about binding ourselves to Christ- walking with Him until the end- --  it’s about binding ourselves to one another- in deep and intimate relationship. 

That doesn't happen by buying a bag of groceries and leaving it out by the door- that can’t be achieved by sending a few thousand dollars to Haiti.   

We are called to be bound together--How will we bind ourselves to Christ today? Will we walk with Christ till the end?   How will we bind ourselves to one another in deep and intimate and meaningful ways?   How are we called to bind ourselves to this community of faith?

Charity or relationship?   The answer is both- but Jesus says today it starts and ends with relationship.

AMEN